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HSP Part 5: Why HSPs Need Community

by Cheri Gregory

Are you ready to lose that overwhelming sense that "something must be wrong with me" and learn, instead, to embrace this HSP gift God’s given you? The Sensitive & Strong Community Cafe will re-open to new members soon, and we’d love to have you join us. Click here to get on the Waiting List.

Are you ready to lose that overwhelming sense that "something must be wrong with me" and learn, instead, to embrace this HSP gift God’s given you? The Sensitive & Strong Community Cafe will re-open to new members soon, and we’d love to have you join us. Click here to get on the Waiting List.

For years, I searched for active online communities of other Christian women who are Highly Sensitive Persons..

I’ve found none and wondered why.

It was my friend and co-author Kathi Lipp who pointed out that HSP Chrisian womanhood is “such a secret club, you wouldn’t even recognize other members if you met them!”

She’s right!

Because there are many types of sensitivity, and we each have our own unique combinations, it’s unlikely that I’ll stumble into a completely “kindred spirit” who is “just like me.”

Let’s suppose, for example, that we’re both at the same women’s retreat together and happen to sit next to each other in the back row.

If I moved there because I find the drum beat overwhelming and you moved there because the women in the front row were wearing heavy perfume, neither one of us will immediately think, “Oh, a soul sister! She and I are really gonna ‘get’ each other!”

Why HSPs Need Community - HSP forum

Coming Together as an HSP Community or HSP Forum

While our individual sensitivities are unique, all more-sensitive-than-most women have one thing in common: a tendency toward over-stimulation.

  • We understand feeling like “It’s just so hard being me!”
  • We’ve all thought, “I’m the only one who struggles like this.”
  • We all struggle with same core lie from the enemy: “I am alone…completely alone.”

Am I suggesting we make “It’s just so hard being me” our theme song?

No. Way.

I am suggesting that feeling lonely and ashamed makes any struggle worse.

And I am declaring that when we join together as sisters in Christ, we can hold up a collective shield of truth to weaken and repel the enemy’s favorite weapons against women:

isolation and shame

The Goal of any HSP Community or HSP Forum

Brene Brown says that “the two most powerful words when we’re in struggle are ‘Me, too!’”

For the HSP woman who has been misunderstood her entire life, there’s nothing quite like finding a kindred spirit who “gets” her.

So, we’d love for you to join us in the Sensitive and Strong Sisters Facebook Group. It’s a safe HSP forum where you’ll find understanding, encouragement, and connection.

Of course, even as we reach out in empathy, we must be careful that in our eagerness to “get” each other we don’t cross into the Holy Spirit’s exclusive line of work and start trying to fix each other.

We must keep in mind that as wonderful as it feels to be heard and understood by a sympathetic sister, the ultimate goal of community is to create a place where we each share our stories so that others will hear about Jesus and head to Jesus.

 

Your Turn

What do you see as the benefits and drawbacks of HSP Christian women coming together in community?

 

HSP Part 1: What Does It Mean to be an HSP?

HSP Part 2: When You’ve Heard “Just Get Over It”

HSP Part 3: It’s “Just So Hard Being Me”

HSP Part 4: Why Self-Care is Anything But Self-ish

HSP Part 5: Why HSPs Need Community

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Categorized: The Basics

About Cheri Gregory

I'm a collaborator at heart. With Kathi Lipp, I'm the co-author of You Don't Have to Try So Hard and Overwhelmed. With Amy Carroll, I'm the co-host of Grit 'n' Grace: The Podcast and co-author of Exhale. With Denise J. Hughes, I'm the co-author of Sensitive & Strong. I've been married to my college sweetheart, Daniel, for almost 32 years and have two adult children: Annemarie and Jonathon.

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Comments

  1. Caryn says

    December 1, 2019 at 8:41 am

    I feel so relieved.i am starting to get the real me and know that there is nothing wrong with me and that i am a powerful sensitive person who wants to and can help other people.i have a gift from God to help people and the devil is trying to distract me…im very happy i found this community

    Reply
  2. Nicola Clay says

    June 16, 2018 at 12:36 pm

    Wow – the lie that “I’m alone, completely alone” has been absolutely crippling in my life. Thanks for this post.

    Reply
  3. Mirna says

    June 6, 2018 at 9:13 pm

    I feel so blessed to finally know that I’m not alone in this HSP journey.

    Reply
  4. Daisy R says

    February 4, 2018 at 12:34 pm

    I too am often blessed by the words “me too” and believe it equally important to give testimony of how God has been growing me in that!

    Reply
  5. SNP says

    September 28, 2017 at 5:45 pm

    God bless you for this website & it’s content. I’ve always been called “overly sensitive” and been made fun of and hated it. I’ve always felt like there is something wrong with me that I cry so easily, am overwhelmed easily by too much to do, smells, others emotions, etc. I just think it’s really great that there are others out there like me and I’m hoping to find tips on how to be a better version of me while keeping Christ at the forefront of everything I do!

    Reply
  6. MICHELE A. SHIVER says

    July 8, 2017 at 7:02 pm

    I really enjoyed this article/blog!

    Reply
  7. Charlotte Parker says

    July 1, 2017 at 7:29 am

    I am interested in participating more in the HSP community…

    Reply
  8. Lynn Woodard says

    June 2, 2017 at 6:53 pm

    This is great. I have so needed this to love myself and others. (I notice we can have different sensory issues.) I need a life do-over. NOT.

    Reply
  9. Cheryl says

    March 22, 2017 at 7:20 am

    I so understand how you did not find Christian women admitting that they are sensitive. We shouldn’t be. We should be strong. And do it all! Not possible for some of us who weren’t raised or trained or made to handle “it” all.

    I see the benefits of community as: support and encouragement, an understanding ear

    And the drawbacks as: tendency to gripe and complain, wallowing in self-pity

    I love that you said not to “fix” each other, but let the Holy Spirit do His job. It reminds me of John 6:68, 69. “Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. We believe and know that you are the Holy One of God.” We can come together in community, but ultimately God in all His fullness fixes and saves us.

    Reply
  10. Sara H says

    April 15, 2013 at 11:19 pm

    I agree with Leesa but also wonder if we’d all be just too sensitive, you know, taking things others type the wrong way and getting hurt too easily. I’ve seen this over and over again in the blogosphere. But I still think it would be worth it. I’m in the Hello Mornings program and that’s all women. Sure there have been a time or two some of the women in a group I’ve been in (myself included) have had a problem, but over all it has been a good experience knowing that we have that support and that people are praying for our needs. I think being in a group of Christian women trying to accomplish the same thing while encouraging each other and praying for each other has really helped me to grow and mature in my faith.

    Reply
  11. Leesa C says

    April 6, 2013 at 9:22 pm

    There is power in not standing alone but it seems a community such as this could move from encouraging to patronizing or/and not promoting growth. One might feel a lack of need for good change. Just a thought.

    Reply

Hi, I’m Cheri Gregory. I’m delighted you’re here!

Cheri Gregory
I believe that every Highly Sensitive Christian woman can grow in confidence, candor, and contentment.

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